And Breathe

The other night I hit my wall. I found myself hiding in the bathroom doing nothing at all except enjoying the quietness. The knowledge that Chad had Alexi allowed me to just breathe. Then I started thinking about needing to get a bath around for her and her nightcap and how to keep her awake to finish it and and and... My quiet moment was ruined and all I wanted to do was cry. It was time. I went out to where Chad was, asked him to put Alexi to bed, and went out for a walk.

It was the most refreshing walk I've ever had! It did a couple things for me. First, it got me out of the house without a diaper bag; only someone with a child knows what a relief that is! It signified that I didn't need to be thinking about Alexi's eating schedule, if she needed to burp, did she need a diaper change, am I playing with her enough, none of it.
Second, being without Alexi allowed me to walk down a road that was not stroller friendly (no good shoulder) and more hilly than I'd walk with Alexi. (read: better workout, switching up the routine)
Third, it was a walk. I've been pretty crappy to myself in my head about me shape or the lack of it. This post baby stuff is for the birds. And I find I feel the best about myself after and during a workout because I know I'm working to change that which I hate.

Fourth, it reminded me that Chad and I are in this adventure together. Being home with Alexi all day everyday sometimes causes be to forget. I start feeling like I have to do it all. But I don't, I'm blessed with a wonderful husband!
Fifth, Brandon called!! Half way through my walk my brother called and talked the rest of my walk. He was on his way back to Illinois from Arizona. I love my family!


The slowing down, taking a time out. It's just what the doctor ordered ;)

BT