Sunday, March 29, 2009

There's a great juggler on the radio tonight!

Given the option of me rambling or not, I was told that I should ramble in these wee hours of the morning. Not sure he knows what he's getting himself into with what kind of mood I'm in. What mood is that you ask...hmmmmm

So somehow I fell asleep during Sister Act with two cousins in the same room. They aren't loud persay, but they aren't always quiet either. I guess they were up pretty late, but I was out and not waking up at 9:30. Let me repeat that. I was out and not waking up at NINE THIRTY IN THE EVENING!!! If you know me at all you will understand the immense oddness of that comment. What is even odder, I didn't wake up until 9:50 this morning. I don't know why. This whole 12 hours of sleep thing made me feel odd today.

On another note, I keep finding myself allowing my mind to wander as I sit and eat in the IWU food place (I guess it's called Baldwin...funny...that's my RA's last name...if you say Grace, I say Baldwin). It reminds me of Chuck's at CU (Brandon's school) from the few times i've eaten in there. I guess it's the same catering service, but Cederville's is bigger or something like that. Anways, that's not supposed to be the point of this little blurb. I keep finding myself thinking about big and small schools and the lost of identity in them. I am well aware of all the ways that large schools try to hold onto the indentity of each student and that the students usually wouldn't notice what I see. But being who I am, I would reek havic on a large school. I would never be content with just my group of people. I would have to be known around school as the random odd weird freaky girl who would walk up to a complete and utter stranger just to say hi (and I would TRY to remember to do it when I'm not hyper). But i'm afraid I would scare many. I even scared a bunch of people at my TINY school by accidentally leaving my room when I was hyper this second semester. By this point I'm over shyness, so the new freshmen this semester got quite a shock. But, back to the point. There is nothing wrong with it, but it would totally be a change for me. I'm just having trouble placing myself in a large institution like this or CU. It makes me laugh to picture it. I'm sure Rachelle was wondering what I was looking at and laughing at whilst we have been eating. Also, I LOVE the ability to people watch here!!!

So tomorrow is up in the air a bit. If the Herrs don't pick up their phone I may end up being stuck here for another day. Which that wouldn't be all bad for me, cuz then I would get homework done, but poor Rachelle, I would feel bad for her. I would be imposing, but I'm rather scared to go off on my own. (Trust the Lord Bri!!!!)

One of my favorite things to do in the world is try to put myself in someone elses shoes. To live like them for a while puts a whole new spin on the world. I started a story (back in my writing days before I realized just how much I sucked at it) about a girl who was a different person in each town that they lived in. I remember I had so many amazing plans for it, but I could figure out how to try them out. We had at that time stopped moving so much. I hope sometime to be able to. Can you imagine putting on that persona and recording everything. How people respond to you, the jobs you get, the looks you get, everything. I love it! Can't wait for my chance! Perhaps it will come when I get my chance to travel the USA. Oh the dreams I wish I could live...

Sorry for springing this random blog on you of a bunch of rambling. Oops, I just appologized again. Compulsive rambling and appologizing seems to be a curse with me. If I'm incredibly awake, or immensly tired, I ramble nonstop. Unfortunately I can't seem to find teh happy medium. So the majority of the time you might want to be careful what you say to me, or you might end up starting me on an large ramble that lasts forever. And what's even worse, I am VERY capable about rambling about anything. So you are better off just not talking to me if you don't want to risk getting an earful everyonce in a while.

Okay, for your sake, the unfortunate reader, I will end your agony and end this ramble session. Hope you got some amusement out of some part of it, even if it's just trying to picture me rambling all this.

Friday, March 27, 2009

In Indiana!

Spring Break has arrived and I left school after grabbing food and filling my gas tank for Indiana! The trip was fairly uneventful, besides that trucker that didn't look in his blind spot when he has 3 cars in a row trying to pass him (almost got squashed). I'm so stoked about being here! (Here is IWU.) I plan on making me and Rachelle (and Hannah when she gets here) take a bunches of pictures and then stealing them, as I have no camera. So here is the first stop on my journey home. I hope it will be filled with memories and random oddness (as it always it with Rachelle and me).

Till later...

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


There is so much that I'm being taught daily...
I committed to praying for 2 hours as much as I could possibly for a friend who was going for Dr. Appointment. I'd forgotten how to do that, and even how it feels to have the Spirit bring things to mind in prayer....
How challenging...

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Here's to dreams...

"Here’s to dreams we won’t surrender,

Lovers lost, and ones remembered

to the bending and the breaking,

the mending and the making"

- MG**

So my God is officially amazing!! (I know...can't believe it took me this long to say human eyes are blind...but oh so opened now!) Just when I am preparing to go through a time of trials after my God blessed me, He switches up my cycle a bit, and I have been blessed again!

I went home this past weekend. I know, surprise surprise, the week before I have spring break. (The most common question award goes to, "Oh, you are on spring break? For how long?"..."Spring break isn't until next week, I'm just up for the musical.") I was stoked about it for 2 weeks before this past stinking weekend would get here. At 2 PM I departed from my Jackson home after a call to my mother dearest. Headed up to Okemos (just east of Lansing) to meet Kathleen. Got a bit nervous as I neared my exit, as I was going to have to drive into Okemos and find her apartment based on some directions I printed out. (Yeah, um, I'm VERY directionally challenged!) I made it to her complex and called her to find out where to park. In a short time we were all packed up in her mom's "cute" yellow bug (I wouldn't suggest it for the the comfort of your passengers, even if you just have one. But it did have this "cute" handy little spot for a vase for flowers right by the steering wheel. Ha ha!) and on hour 2 1/2 hour drive to the north woods.

Kathleen surprised me. I haven't really sat down and talked to her ever I don't think, but this car ride didn't have a silent moment I don't think. Even after my throat was dry and scratchy, she was just fine carrying the conversation. We talked about anything and everything under the sun. She proved herself a great and amazing Christian example and (she might kill me if she ever sees this) "mentor"-type conversationalist. Her perspective on things was so different than I had found from anyone else. Plus, she has the best music in the "Grey's Anatomy" genre!!

We got to the school and I found myself hit with this overwhelming feeling of homesickness as soon as I saw my mom. I didn't want to stay and eat and watch the musical. I just wanted to pack my parents into the van and drive home to spend time just in the house together. Instead I settled for a hug from both (I did TRY not to hang on them, but I so wanted to) and a sloppy joe sandwich (which was amazing!!). I talked with Kathleen and mommy until my dad finished his meeting. I was told people wanted to see me, so I snuck upstairs to the dressing room where I surprised people as they wandered upstairs to get dressed in their costumes.

Besides my mommy, my friend Katie met me at the door to the school!! I can NOT tell you how much I miss that girl! Unfortunately, because of musical schedule and such, the only time I spent with her was at the school and at church on Sunday. =`(

After all the happy greetings and excited meetings and even a little running for my dad just for old times sake, I sat to watch the musical that I was once again hyped about. The Overture started and I couldn't seem to get comfortable; I wasn't supposed to be to sitting and watching, these were my fellow actors, not my friends to watch in a play, I was supposed to be up there with them. No matter how much I tried, I couldn't shake that feeling the whole night, I was just sort of out of it. I didn't have the time to dwell on it though. Logan, my favorite little guy who adores me, started the musical boldly and bravely. I'm not sure I would have been able to do that at his age. Acting opposite David (also one of my favorite guys) I was beyond surprised! My shy timid David was singing was such confidence and in his beautiful voice, showing the personality I knew was in there. Person after person that night surprised me. About in the middle I was in tears, missing my time with these amazing singers, actors, and friends. They did so amazing! By far the BEST musical I've seen in quite a LONG time!!

For the rest of the weekend I bummed around, visited with peoples, and did homework. It was such an amazing weekend (I just didn't get all the homework done that I should have. *big smile).

I really didn't want to leave on Sunday, but I did; missing supper at home and here. So I went digging in my change jar and found $1.30 and decided it was time for a taco bell run. I found Hannah. She has quickly become one of my dearest friends in the last 2 weeks. She's in Callie's dorm and a freshman. The conversation that ensued there at taco bell over my warm gooey delicious cheesy double beef burrito was amazing. What was supposed to be a 10 minute conversation turned into an hour conversation.

I'm writing all this, in such detail, so when I face trials of many kind, like I know I will, I can look back and see God's blessings and look for His faithfulness. I know He will be faithful!


**Note** Some lines written by Matt Gagle. Yet another blessing from God and quickly becoming one of my best friends!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Blessings on a sunny Sunday

After a gorgeous Saturday, Amie and I decided to walk to church in the morning. I attend Ganson Street Baptist Church about 2 miles away from the school. So I checked the weather and we dressed accordingly to walk the 2 miles in the glorious morning sun. It was so much more amazing to hear the bird, feel the warmth of the sun growing, the cool night air leaving then I could put in words. I'm not a huge nature freak, but there are certain things that I just miss terribly about living at Camp Barakel and seeing, hearing, smelling, and feeling the Lord's creation on a spring or summer morning is one of those things. There is no feeling it compares to.

There was a scrumptious soup lunch after church and I noticed something else the Lord has been doing in my life. Building relationships in our church is something stressed by the school but I always had an issue with lasting conversations that mean something. Small talk and random facts I can initiate well, like in a working together situation. I tend to have an issue with genuinely getting to know someone well in a face-to-face talking once a week at church situation. Through upperclassmen and teachers and other random people, I'm finding it easier to ask relevant questions that really allows me to take a true interest in people. So I spent lunch consciously trying to builder a closer and better relationship with my coworker in Adventure Clubs (children's ministry on Sunday nights). I was surprised at the quality of conversation that I had.

The return walk to the school with Amie provided amazing time for conversation. I'm growing so close to that girl. The depth and understanding of a friendship when we both watch each other grow in the Lord and help each other grow is amazing.

I spent the afternoon doing homework and planning my music to do with the children that night. At Adventure Clubs I got prepared to do the music. One new song (Jesus Loves Me - remixed), Victory Chant (second week doing it), and All In All...trying to use time, calm them down, and also that's just a really great song. I've had issues since taking it over. I don't feel like I was confident and they could tell causing them to react differently to it. Well last night I felt confident and I felt like the kids might have actually enjoyed it. It was such an encouragement.

After finishing my homework for today, Amie and I decided that we wanted to see real stars. I knew I had before driven down in a certain area and found a lake so we went looking for it. When my memory failed me we decided just to keep driving. We took turns deciding which ways she should turn as we were enjoying the still cool evening, great music, and NOT CITY (we even found a dirt road to turn onto). The sun was almost completely gone and we weren't sure exactly where we were but decided to keep driving to find a lake. We ended up in Grass Lake (still not sure where that is, but it's exit 150 on 94) and we found a lake and watched the stars come out.

When we returned to the school my parents were online and I heard the final verdict if I could go to IWU, Schoolcraft and Hudsonville. I am so stoked for spring break, it'll be awesome!! And my dorm was a hub of activity as we were all getting our costumes for today, Redneck day for spirit week.

At the end of the day, God's "Thank you for this day" was no where near satisfactory to express my thanks.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Spring...Once there was a thing called Spring

I'm really excited!!! It's SPRING!!! (well soon to be...)
For some reason spring is getting me really excited, and I'm not sure why. I'm happier, not as tired, have a lot more energy. Not sure that I've ever experienced this much of a spring "high" before, and not sure what to make of it.

But, it's gone far enough that my Amie and I are walking to church tomorrow (granted we have a nice day again). For some reason i can't get this song out of my head just because I've been soaking up as much vitamin D as possible.

I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine

I got a love and I know that it's all mine, oh, oh oh oh

Do what you want but you're never gonna break me

Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me, oh, oh oh oh

I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine

I got a love and I know that it's all mine, oh, oh oh oh

Wish that you could but you ain't gonna own me

Do anything you want you can't slow me down, oh, oh oh oh

Take me away, a secret place

A sweet escape, take me away

Take me away to better days

Take me away, a hiding place

Anyways, just a shout out to spring and how happy it makes me!!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

I'm Singing in the Rain

I've been hit.  Time after time this past week I've been thanking God for the AMAZING blessing He has given me with my roommates and dorm parents.  I can't tell you what kind of amazing blessing they have been to me.  After last semester I had determined that I was going to come back for the study of the Word, not for the social aspect of being here.  I came away from the first semester with no really close friends that were going to still be here this next semester.  So I started with the idea of, study all the time, and when you come back in 2 years you can rent an apartment and work all the time.  Oh boy did the Lord ever show me how wrong I could be.

The first bump in the road to that plan was the addition to my dorm.  A charming young lady named Grace Baldwin filled the void spot left by Becca (who graduated) as our RA.  We'd never had an RA in our room, last semester we were connected to the room next to us, sharing their RA.  Confession time, last semester, I had no desire to get to know Graciela at all.  She was this short, adorable gal from sunny CA who could sing amazingly well AND play the guitar.  There were those who last semester decided that they couldn't balance more than one close friendship, and chose her.  I was hurt and decided to take it out by not making the effort to get to know her.  It wasn't until the end of the semester last semester that I swallowed my pride and tried to get to know her at all.  I still held some of that bitterness when we started this semester.  For her to be my RA was almost too much.  This 21 year old was going to be the end of me.  Fortunately, she proved herself to be impossible to ignore.  Too great to overlook.  Very quickly I discovered our uncanny ability to be there for each other when we need it most, and adopted my favorite spot to sit in her room and pour my guts out to her.  We love going to the mall and learned that when we are together all money needs to be left here at the school.  Carrying on one long conversation all week is my favorite.  She rocks my socks!

Grace did more than just open me back up to trying for relationships, but she also opened our whole dorm to becoming a dorm.  I'd never really gotten close to Rachel because she goes home every weekend, but the atmosphere of our dorm room seems to have taken a turn.  We chose to stay in here to hang out and people chose to come in here to hang out.  We started really early on with hanging as a dorm, going to Maggie Moo's on the coldest day of the winter for ice cream.  We then met with our dorm parents and were "officially" adopted.  We go as a dorm to their house all the time, have special days to celebrate our birthdays, and have random sleepovers as a dorm.

Then there is my bum.  Amie Christine Dryer is my next door neighbor, and attached herself to our couch last semester (proclaiming, "we are one" speaking about her and the couch).  I met her in a bored moment during our outing at the beach last semester and she's not been able to get rid of me since.  Amie, Anna Ruiter (my roommate) and I tend to do many things together.  Just the other day we decided to enjoy the weather together and went for a walk with a camera.  But beyond that, I've learned so much more about Amie and from her this semester than I thought I would.  We were doing homework together at Conni's one day and we spent 2 hours just talking about things we are learning in class and how we apply that to our lives.  We are so different and so much alike that we are constantly grating against each other making me think and examine my life and actions.

There are many more in my life, but this is part 1 of this, I have church in the morning that i can't be too tired for.